The art of being fearless in social situations

It is easy to frighten someone if that person is already frighten. Try scaring a dog. If the dog gets scared and starts running away from you, you will be motivated to scare him further.

But, what will happen if you try to hit the dog and the dog shows his teeth, his hind legs tightened, ready to pounce on you? You will walk away and say to yourself “This is not someone I should be messing up with!”. Then next time when you see that dog again, would you try to hit him? You wouldn’t. ( Ofcourse, unless you aren’t retarded).

Same is with the humans. You might want to argue dogs and humans are different and we can’t draw comparisons with them. Yes, they might physically and intellectually differ. But, the entire animal kingdom has one thing in common- fear.

Every new person (including your friends, co-workers and bosses)  you meet in your life will at some point try to test you. They will start small. The same way we first try to wave at dog as if you are going to hit him. That is the first step of inducing fear. That is the point when you have to retaliate. If you don’t, you are teaching the other person that it’s okay to push you around. This becomes a viscous cycle. Next time that person sees you, they are going to have little fun with you.

And with time you will have a reputation of being a person who never says no and accepts whatever is being imposed on him or her.

Start pushing back. When the person throws shit at you, take the same shit and stuff that into his or her mouth. At the same time you are setting up an example for other people to observe you. You are sending a message that they can’t bully you.

Retaliation doesn’t mean you show your teeth like a dog and pounce on them. It is setting up the standards in the start itself as to what is acceptable and what is not. When someone tries to make fun of you in the public place and you don’t like it, meet that person in one-to-one and tell him clearly that his behavior was unacceptable and it is not happening again. That person will try to justify that it was all in fun and friend, you stop him right there and repeat what you can’t accept.

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